Like paint on walls...such is life.

I got my dining room painted.

It's red. I love it.

As I was painting, Chad made the comment, "Man, there must be a lot of layers of paint on this wall."

I thought about it. He was probably right.

I have painted it two times since we have lived here. Each time I put one coat of primer and two coats of color. Yup, that's six layers. I don't know how many times it was painted before we lived here, but my guess is there was, at minimum, at least one more layer of primer and two layers of color. Nine layers total. And possibly even more than that.

"That's the fun part," I said. "It's so easy to change it when I get tired of it. When it gets scratched and scuffed and dirty, I can just slap a new coat of paint up, and it's good as new."

As I was painting, I kept thinking. This wall isn't much different than any of us, is it?

I started to think about all of the different coats I have painted myself over the years. We all go through so many changes and transformations throughout our life. Just like these walls.

When we get scuffed or dirty, we can make the decision to stay the same, or we can change things. We can slap a new coat of paint on and make things better than they were.

Isn't that what we all try to do at the beginning of each new year anyway? Aren't New Year's Resolutions just fresh coats of paint?

.....


I really like the shade that my life is painted right now.

Really, what more could I ask for...I have a wonderful husband that works hard to provide for my family; our daughter is more amazing than words can even begin to describe; I love my job and I am fortunate enough to work part-time in order to be able to spend more time with Lyla; I own my own BeautiControl business, which is just awesome; we have a roof over our heads, nice cars to drive and money in our pockets. There really isn't too much more I could ask for.

If I have given any indications that I am anything but happy in my life, I have to sincerely apologize.

I mean, maybe you caught me venting..."Oh my, I'm going to be so tired today because I was up all night with a teething baby," or "Wow I wish I could get this child to take a nap," or "I wish my husband was home more often," or even "I'm kind of losing my mind today."

I'm sorry. I am only human. Sometimes I get tired. Sometimes I get stressed. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed. If you have never felt any of those feelings before, I am impressed. Please do, tell me how you do it.

Maybe I'm tired because any time Lyla wakes up at night, I rush in there to comfort her. Maybe it's because I have refused to ever let her cry-it-out. It's just not something I feel comfortable with or believe in. Maybe it's because I breastfed her and never gave her formula, despite the claims that formula would make her sleep better. I'm sorry, I do what I know in my heart is best for my child. Even if it means less sleep.

Maybe I'm stressed because I try really hard to be super mom. I spend almost all of my free time with Lyla, even if it means I can't get my house cleaned or work on my business or have any "me" time.  I don't feel comfortable passing her off to just anyone. Even if it means I get stressed.

Maybe I am overwhelmed because I try to take on too much, and despite some select supportive family and friends, I just don't have a lot of extra help, and I don't feel comfortable asking just anyone. Even if it means that I sometimes get overwhelmed.

I'm okay with it.

Really though, I wouldn't think that those few and far between comments would overshadow the seven million positive things that I say about my life. How about "I can't imagine loving my daughter any more than I do," or "I'm so proud that my 22 month old is potty trained!" or "I'm so in love with my baby girl," or "Spending a beautiful day with my beautiful baby," or "I'm so amazed at what a smart girl Lyla is!" or "Date night with my wonderful husband." How about the eighteen billion happy pictures I post of Lyla, and my family, and my life?

Honestly, you can make of it all what you wish.

I'm slapping up a fresh coat of paint this year. I refuse to let anyone else's negativity bring me down. I refuse to let the little things bother me. So what if I have some friends who have never even met my daughter, and she's almost 2. So what if I have friends who don't so much as ask how my daughter is doing, or even comment on how cute she is when I post pictures. So what, if people who once came to visit and see Lyla when she was a baby, don't so much as pick up the phone and call to ask how she is doing anymore. She is doing great, by the way. She is talking up a storm, smart as can be, curious and energetic and full of sass and independence and life. She is funny and playful and snuggly and I just love her to pieces. I do feel sad for the people who choose not to see this, but hey, it's okay, I know I'm not gonna miss a second of it.

And you know what? If you are one of those negative people, I'll still be nice to you when I see you. Even if you have said something nasty behind my back. Even if you don't ever call me to chat or hang out. Even if you defriended me from facebook. It's okay. I feel bad for you, actually.

It might just be that you are unhappy with the shades of grey that you have painted your own life. Maybe you, too, should try to slap on a fresh coat of paint this year.



May I recommend red?